I have never been an animal person. I’ve never owned a pet, nor do I aspire to own one. I don’t think of myself as a person without feelings or compassion- I’m just not an animal person. Not only that, but I don’t really understand animal people. Most animal lovers will lay down their lives to bring awareness to any kind of animal suffering but will show complete indifference to the infinite human suffering taking place all over the world. I find that very strange.I don’t think most dogs are cute; some are, but most are pretty ugly. I think that squirrels, chipmunks, gofers, beavers, skunks, hamsters, gerbils, rabbits and raccoons are all different names and/or aliases for rats; cats are sneaky; birds are pretty to look at, but not to take care of and reptiles all belong in their natural habitat, not the water-filled tank in your kitchen. When I tell people this, they tend to look at me like I just told them I had lunch with Adolf Hitler. I get the ‘you didn’t really have a childhood if you didn’t have a pet’ or ‘you don’t know what you’re missing’. Well, actually I had a great childhood and I do know what I’m missing. There’s nothing attractive about being the dreaded Cat Lady or having a dog that just licked it’s behind turn around and lick your face. Nor is it cool to have your house smelling like the Metro Zoo. Nevertheless, I don’t hate animals. I don’t support cruelty directed toward animals, nor do I subscribe to their exploitation. I’m just not into them- just like I’m not into liver and lima beans or extreme sports.
So, no, I don’t want to see a picture of your dog/cat/rat/pig. And no, I don’t care whether or not he caught a ball/Frisbee last weekend. I am not interested in petting your rabbit and I don’t feel like feeding your turtle. Oh and by the way, your puppy-wuppy looks ridiculous in that pink bonnet. No offense.
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